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9 Funny Cat Quotes and Sayings

9 Funny Cat Quotes and Sayings Graphic

Let’s face it… Cat’s can be unintentionally hilarious!  That’s why I gathered the top nine funny cat quotes and sayings for your amusement.

Just because this is a site about a very serious topic does NOT mean we can’t poke fun at some things, even our beloved feline friends!

Side note: I have a new kitten foster! Follow me on Instagram (or elsewhere) to see videos and pictures of the new girl I named Oreo! The links can be found in the right sidebar of my site!

Now, onto the quotes!

9 Funny Cat Quotes and Sayings

“Cats rule the world.”

Jim Davis, Cartoonist

Cats rule the world graphic

I love Garfield and I love the cartoonist’s quotes as well. They’re always great!

“In ancient times, cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.”

Terry Pratchett, Author

We all know that cat. I don’t have a god or goddess cat currently, as most of mine don’t even have dignity right now. But I bet you can name one this quote fits perfectly. Right?

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are God. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are God.”

Christopher Hitchens, Author

Hmmm, this one probably goes along with the other quote, but it’s so dang true! Dogs do think we are their god. Cats think THEY are!

“The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.”

Paula Poundstone, Comedian

I haven’t tested this, but it’s likely true! Hee. Especially some of my crew!

“Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.”

James Harriot, Veterinarian

Cats are connoisseurs of comfort quote graphic.

Truth! Every single one of my furry monsters love the warmest spots, the softest blankets, and insist on sleeping wherever they feel like it. Including my dang laptop stand!

“I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days.”

Bill dana, Comedian

Been there, done that. My cats trained me, not the other way around! I’ve got them trained to follow me around the barns. That’s their choice, though. I didn’t try to train them!

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”

Robert A. Heinlein, Author

Women and cats will do what they please quote graphic.

Interestingly enough, this might be exactly why most cat lovers are women. This might also why I find men who love cats sexy as all get out. Because they obviously have taste and understanding to let a cat be a cat and do what she wants!

“When my cats aren’t happy, I’m not happy. Not because I care about their mood but because I know they’re just sitting there thinking up ways to get even.”

Percy Bysshe Shelley, Poet

This one cracks me up. I did have a cat that was EXACTLY like this. She was evil incarnate and would literally exact vengeance for every single time you moved her off a counter. She attacked and ignored me for a whole month after I returned from a 10-day vacation. She was okay and being kitty-sat by a friend. But she was MAD. Spitting mad.

This quote makes me miss her all over again. I love you and miss you, Luna.

“Cats have a scam going – you buy the food, they eat the food, they go away; that’s the deal.”

Eddie Izzard, Actor

I picked this one to round us off with funny cat quotes and sayings because it fits those of us who care for cat colonies. Sometimes it DOES feel like they’re totally scamming us into feeding them and then they vanish, most too unsocialized to want love or attention in the form of physical affection.

But sometimes just one look in their eyes and you know their life has been hard and they depend on you for that food. They feel safe enough to come to eat from you daily.

They may not welcome touch, but they love us just as much.

Ferals are worth saving, too!


So I had to do a bonus section with a couple more funny cat quotes! I couldn’t help it, I had so much fun with this one!

“I read that when cats are cuddling and kneading you, and you think it’s cute, they’re really just checking your vitals for weak spots.”

Kandyse McClure, Actress

This quote cracks me up. We know this is untrue and most of us find it adorable because we know they do this to mimic nursing from mom. It’s safety and affection and comforting to them.

However, some cats… you don’t know, right?

“The more cats you have, the longer you live. If you have a hundred cats, you’ll live 10 times longer than if you have 10. Someday this will be discovered, and people will have a thousand cats and live forever. It’s truly ridiculous.”

Charles Bukowski, Poet

Don’t we WISH this were true? Maybe we should pass this rumor around, maybe more people will be open to adopting and caring for cats!

“I’ve always been mad about cats.”

Vivien Leigh, Actress

What a coincidence! Me too!


Do you have a favorite funny cat quote or saying you would like to share? Leave me a comment below!


16 thoughts on “9 Funny Cat Quotes and Sayings”

  1. Couldn’t resist giving you my favorite cat Quote:

    “Dogs have owners, cats have staff.”

    I don’t know who to attribute it to, but it’s a very fitting quote, I think!

    1. Ooooh! That is definitely a great saying. It’s not attributed to anyone, I believe. Just a saying people use, kind of like “No use crying over spilled milk.” Everyone says it, no one knows who first coined it. But thanks so much!

  2. Hi, there is the saying. It is- what is better than watching cat videos? Exactly, nothing! I find that every time I want to send an uplifting text message to my mom, that I will send a funny cat video from YouTube. She always loves those very much. Cats can be absolutely hilarious, and they make awesome pets. Dogs can be a little bit too much maintenance. Whereas cats are much more easy to take care of. They are definitely an awesome pet, and this cool site has taught me many things already. Great job here.

    1. Thanks so much.  You’re right, what is better than watching cat videos?  I don’t think anything actually IS better than watching cat videos!  

      Though I will point out that cats are more independent and thus less likely to demand your attention every second of every day like a dog does, and thus easier to care for, they do still require the same level of veterinary care and they do need some play and fun time to keep them mentally healthy, especially if they live indoors.

      Thanks for visiting!

  3. Simply extraordinary.

    Coming up with a fun way to express your love for cats. I have to say though, I enjoyed the post. I particularly like the quote from the comedian, Bill Dana about getting trained by cats not the other way round. 

    I also found the quote by James Harriot interesting because it is so true.

    Thanks for putting smiles on my face, great post.

    I’ll be on the lookout for more! Cheers!

  4. LOL! Very funny quotes!
    I really like this quote:
    “In ancient times, cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this. “- Terry Pratchett, Author.

    I feel that the quote is very true. Because I feel my cat is just lazing around at home. Never work. Even the rat before his eyes, ignored by him. 

    And every single day, looking at me with a look:
    “Go to work, so you have money to feed me”
    “Regards, YOUR GOD”

    But even so, I thought the cat was indeed cute and adorable.

    By the way, do you have cats at home? How many?

    1. Hi!  That IS one of my favorite cat quotes!  I have 2.5 pet cats and I care for another 14 foster cats or barn cats or community cats who live outside.  That’s a lot of cats, right?!

      I have two and a half cats because one of my foster cats is never going to be able to be adopted I think, so he’s mine.  I just haven’t gotten around to admitting to three yet!

      Thanks for stopping by!

  5. I loved your website, it brought back memories of my mother and all of the cats she had down through the years. She loved each cat she ever had and they were all spoiled rotten. They seemed to think that my mother was their mother and of course, she treated them with great love just as she did for us. 

    The last cat she had was very old and had become mean in her ladder years attacking anyone who came into the house. This went on until she put the cat into a cage used to take transport animals to the vet. She placed it in the bathroom and turned out the lights to try and calm the cat down. This was no dumb cat and she somehow managed to get out of the cage for which my mom then decided it was not meant to be and she did not take her cat to the vet. What is amazing is that the bad behavior stopped completely and the cat never attacked anyone again. 

    They were both old and in poor health and not too long after that old cat died, mom passed on as well. We can often tell who is greatest among us by how they treat and serve those who appear to be the least among us, including small animals and those who may at times exhibit bad behavior. 

    Your website is something I know she would enjoy, especially the humor as she never took herself or life so serious that she could not laugh and have fun along the way.

    Best of luck with your website. Oh yeah, it turns out I am allergic to cats lol.


    1. Aww, thanks for sharing that story!  Some cats in their elderly years will change personalities like that completely.  I find it interesting she stopped attacking people after the carrier incident!

      I’m sorry you’re allergic to cats!  They’re awesome animals and I don’t know what I’d do if I had allergies to them.  But I am glad you have fond memories of them and your mother!

      Thanks for stopping by!

  6. Hi Rochelle. I am proud to be a cat lover :3 even I can not “pet” a real one. I have watched some YouTube videos about cats. Honestly, I don’t like dogs at all. Cats are more interesting to me. Aigoo~ some cats are very cute~ I love to have one in real! near my parent’s house, it has around 2,3 cats… TT.TT they run away when I approach them…

    Haha first quote: “Cats rule the world” I wonder what kind of the world haha I hear some cats can enter the three-dimension worlds: this current world, the Underworld such as Hell in religion, and the Heaven world of Chris. For this world 🙂 I think the first quote is correct. Cats afraid no-one. Even some ghosts, in an unofficial way, are scared of the normal living cat!

    Sometimes, cats have the unofficial nickname “king/queen” because they will do what they want haha regardless of how we train them, how we love them.

    Hmmm… the second quote. I think it’s Ancient Egyptians that have been worshiped a cat as a God. I think that tradition is still existing in somewhere else besides Ancient Egypt.

    And the last quote before your bonus XD haha do you think it’s not a scam in a different angle? Just give and take. You give food for Cat-> and what you receive is the cuteness. Or the honor for giving food for cat haha Not everyone can pet and food me~ Meow~

    Aigoo~ about the quote from actress Vivien Leigh… I bet Taylor Swift will argue about it. Taylor is preparing for one musical performance with the main topic is about cats. I hear the name of that musical is “Cats” too. Taylor loves so~ much to be a cat in that performance!

    1. Rochelle Pritchett

      Cats are definitely still worshipped in some areas.  Look at all the cat videos!  Thanks so much for stopping by!

  7. Hi! These quotes really made me laugh. Thanks for putting this post together. I’ll share it with a few of my friends.

    One of the quotes I liked the most was that about men and dog having to get used to the idea of cats and women doing things their way. Hmm…

  8. It’s funny though that dogs thinks we’re god because we provide and cats thinks of themselves as god because still we provide. It’s kind of hilarious.

    Awesome post. I think I’ve got a cat quote for you.

    “After scolding one’s cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word. And has filed it for reference.”

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